What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

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Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

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At least until the peyote kicks in ...

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Why have cell phones, the internet, and reality TV turned the world into a toilet, as this has not advanced us in any way?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Why do Trumpers and MAGA Republicans care who is trans and who is gay ECT? If they didn't have a personal interest in transgenderism it shouldn't matter so much then, right?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Make Nazis afraid again!

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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Why do many women in Turkey prefer to date blacks as a lover?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

TEXT:

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

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Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

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After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!